First Date Tips: A Gentleman’s Perspective

First Date Tips: A Gentleman’s Perspective
The Nepali security guard’s heavily accented English reverberated into the car as I fumbled around for my driver’s license.

I had promised to pick Rick from his house to have lunch at some bagel house nearby.

I was running late from finishing up work, but was glad to meet up with him as we rarely had much chance to catch up on our lives since we live halfway across the country.

After placing our orders, he let me in on his recent dating experiences and time just flew by swiftly before Charmaine joined us an hour later. Since Vik was a semi-retired writer( not too long ago), he generously shared his perspectives eloquently about what he finds enticing and alluring about First Dates impressions.

Numero Uno – Making an effort to look presentable counts as many plus points in giving a first good impression. A decent outfit with a light whiff of cologne/perfume is a good start to a great date. A warm smile with a genuine greeting also shows that you’re looking forward to your date’s company.

After seated down with menus in hand for the dinner date, be attentive to what the other person has to speak about. Be interested in what is going on in his part of the world, and do concentrate on what she has to share on the date. Listen to what your date has to say, and take heed of the conversation at hand. People warm up when they can detect if the other party is genuinely interested in them.

Maintain good eye contact and open body language. Avoid crossing both arms too much as this can come across as defensive. Be comfortable talking about yourselves.

Share one or two quirky details about yourself to lighten the mood.

Make a smooth transition from small talk soon enough and move on to more interesting topics. Rick shared how he met a classy and elegant woman who happened to be a Vietnamese portrait artist. He showed us a picture of both of them standing next to a portrait that she painted of a certain elderly Prime Minister and his wife. Rick mentioned how his date could talk as much about art, aesthetic beauty, as well as entrepreneurship. Conversation flowed easily.

It’s also fun when the other party has a wicked sense of humour and can laugh at herself as well as crack a joke or two.

From Rick’s perspective, he appreciates flirty teasing and appropriate light physical contact. Turning up on time for the date also is a polite gesture.

So, what are some of the Don’ts during First Dates?

One of the major pet peeves for most people are texting/playing with your phone whilst on the date.

It can get quite tiresome when only one party is making an effort to make a meaningful connection.

Don’t talk about exes.

Be culturally sensitive. Rick is a mixed race dude, so sometimes he gets inquisitive questions about politically incorrect assumptions about different races.

Don’t blow smoke in front of your date. Plus, it gives you a higher risk of lung cancer.

Don’t have noisy table manners

Don’t be caught openly remarking and checking out other people during the date ( Just do it discreetly or do it together on the 14 th date!)

Finally, if both parties spark interest mutually, make plans for a second date, and see how things progress!
Jamaline C.
True believer of the art of loving yourself. Jamaline sees people in all walks of life coping with difficulties as her profession.